My eldest daughter has cried A LOT this week. While some of it can be chalked up to the melodramatic of a threenager, I am acutely aware that she hasn’t been feeling her best. Just when we overcome one health hurdle, we seem to be hit with another. Last night it was in the form of an intense earache, and my heart just hurt for my poor girl.
We’ve already claimed her full and complete healing, as well as healing for the rest of the household (now my dad is fighting something off…sigh), and we know that it’s done. So as we do what we need to in order to help the process along, I want to be right there with my child.
I want to be the one holding her hand, rubbing her head, and swaying her back and forth in my loving arms. I want to bring her sweet comfort, and I want my voice to soothe her to sleep as I assure her that she’ll be better soon.
All I want to do is see her better and help her in anyway I can, but unfortunately that’s not what she has in mind.
During this trying time, her numerous tears have also been accompanied by the proclamation that she doesn’t want her mommy.
Now I completely understand the toddlers can be fickle, but this is new territory for me. I’m pretty used to my bonafide daddy’s girl exhibiting preference for her wonderful, hands-on father, but in her times of distress I’ve always been the one she’s turned to. At least I was. Now she screams & cries for me to go away, and if her dad is around she has no problem banishing me (or at least attempting to) from her presence. It’s one thing to see my child sob because her tummy hurts or her head is throbbing, but when her big salty tears are rolling down her cheeks because she is offended by the very thought of her mommy sitting next to her on the couch, I can say with all sincerity that it breaks my heart.
In this case the sting of rejection feels more like a dagger.
As incredibly well adjusted as she’s been, maybe this is her way of responding to the constant attention her baby sister gets from me.
Perhaps she’s relishing this time with my hubby before circumstances change, and as a good man should, he makes her feel safe and protected.
I’m not jealous of their relationship, and the truth is we have plenty of mother/daughter bonding time. In fact, by the end of some days I’m ready to send her on her way to whoever’s willing to entertain her!
Still, this time the rejection hurt.
Talk about a new found appreciation for my own mother! I never thought I’d be having that “no matter how hard you try, you can’t get rid of me because I love you too much” conversation with my 3 year old. Well I have, and as long as there’s breath in my lungs I will continue to ensure her that I won’t be going anywhere!
Hurt feelings won’t change that.
Harsh words won’t change that.
A string of bad days won’t change that.
She’s stuck with me for life, and even as I fight back my own tears, mommy’s love remains steadfast and unconditional.
How do you handle the sting of rejection?
Take comfort in the greatest example of unconditional love, shown to us by our Lord and Savior.
For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:38-39 NKJV)