This was me Saturday:
Here I was a glowing mom and bubbly hostess at my daughter’s 3rd birthday party. Enjoying the warm weather and overwhelmed with gratitude for all the love that was shown to our family that day.
Five days later, my picture of motherhood looks a tad different:
From that blissful Saturday afternoon to now, I’ve done my best to manage a baby with a cough and runny nose, a lethargic toddler with an upset tummy, and my own set of growing symptoms. I’ve wiped snot from a variety of special places, been vomited on, washed sheets that were vomited on, stayed up all night in the reclining chair holding my poor, fussy baby, and all the while getting grumpier by the minute as my own ailing body threatened to slow me down.
I drank numerous cups of tea in between cold medicine, as I tried to push past the tickle
fire in my throat, but when I awoke this morning I discovered my right eye was a delightful shade of RED. There was no denying this new development, so I was off to see the doctor.
The verdict? This mama has pink eye AND strep throat!
Ugh. That sure puts a damper on things! 😒
So, I sat in the exam room feeling sorry for myself for a whole two minutes, then I thanked God.
I thanked God that while this is definitely annoying and uncomfortable, it is easily treatable and I will be back to my old self in no time. That is something I do not take for granted by any means.
I also thanked Him for giving me two daughters who listen, because they listened when I held them in my arms these past few days and told them to give their illness and germs to me (something my own mother still says to this day 💜). I wanted to be the one to bear their burdens, and see them well even if it meant I suffered (and to think, this is how Jesus feels about me!!!).
I thanked the Lord for being the ultimate healer and deliverer, and for the confidence I have in Him making a way even when my body is worn out and I feel I have nothing left to give.
Oh, and I thanked him for easing my guilt over having to limit my interactions with the girls as I am currently contagious. 😢
Oh this mommy life!
Like the first photo, I’d rather primp, pose, and re-take so many mommy moments until they all turn out just right (I mean, can’t we just skip over the yucky stuff?!). However, I am in a season where it seems these not-so pretty experiences are the rapidly growing reality, and I’m learning to be ok with that. There’s no need to gloss over the struggles because in addition to that put together version of myself, I am also that unfiltered woman with the disheveled hair who wears no make-up.
This is not just about outward appearances. Yes, I’m physically sick today, but there are plenty of days that I feel like a total mess! Days where my spirit struggles to make sense of things, and days that I wonder if I am getting any of this right. Days that make me want to run away, and days that I just want to lock myself in the bathroom and cry.
Motherhood isn’t always a pretty picture.
Motherhood is messy, frustrating, taxing, humbling, sanctifying and downright hard sometimes!
I don’t enjoy every. single. moment. (eek am I supposed to say that?!), but I do appreciate them all, and whether I find myself facing the good, the bad or the ugly, the Lord knows I wouldn’t trade it for the world!
What does your picture of mommyhood look like today?